Parenting Time Tips for Happier Holidays
Barbra Homier of Homier Law and Courtney Quist of Quist Law discuss the challenges of holiday parenting time is their most recent podcast at Divorce Outside the Box (available through Anchor).
Some of the tips shared include:
Review your Judgment of Divorce or Parenting Time Order early rather than later. Do not procrastinate.
Consider being the bigger person and conceding to a change in the schedule — particularly if the change will be better for your children and likely has little impact on you. If you are making a change, make sure and get that change in writing. Emails is better then text to memorialize a modification in the schedule, particularly if you two negotiated a swamp in future holidays or makeup parenting time.
Do your best to work out the schedule with your ex. It is always better to resolve parenting time schedules outside of court. Pick up the phone or set up a Zoom or Google Hangouts meeting. It is a lot easier to work out a schedule verbally then via email or text. Tone is not always conveyed well in writing. If you do have an agreement via Zoom or Google Hangouts a great option is to record the portion of the session with the agreement. Just make sure you save it.
Look to mediation as a very good option to resolve disagreements rather than court. You do not need an attorney to represent you in mediation when it relates to working out a schedule that is best for your child. Parents are the experts of their children. Not judges and definitely not divorce lawyers. This is also a very affordable process that can be conducted by Zoom. The best part is that it is private. Family law mediators are experienced divorce attorneys and know how to help parents compromise and reach agreements that are in their children’s best interests.
Going to court should be your very last resort. Its expensive and it is not good for your children. If your ex is being a jerk and the change in the schedule is required for a special event (perhaps a special trip with grandparents) filing a motion may be your only option. If that is the case, you’ will need to get moving on that motion several weeks before the trip. Judge’s only hear cases on certain days and the Court Rules require attorneys to file and serve motions on the opposing party a minimum of 7 days before the hearing. In short, if its December 22 and you want to go to court, it is too late.
The best piece of advice any family law attorney can give is to tell you that you are a model for your children. Your behavior will directly impact your children. Your choices and your behavior are in your control and will have a very significant impact on how your children will look back at their holidays.
